“Mother in law as my shelter”
People mostly praise their parents; some are annoyed at their husband, and some bear pain from their mother-in-law, father-in-law and relatives-in-law. There are many blessings on my poor soul of Allah that Allah has blessed me with such a mother .
It is the blessing of Allah on me that He blessed me with a good father, mother, brothers, sisters, and sister-in-law. Father-in-law and mother-in-law are good to such an extent that their praise can’t be explained in these pages. I thought to write in the magazine “Saibaan” for my mother-in-law, who is not only her child’s awning but also of her daughter-in-laws.
My mother-in-law has a very humble and meek personality and the one having fright of Allah. In the start, when I came after marriage I thought that she is my enemy due to the affects of media and various people sayings. I used to say my friends before marriage that I am afraid of my mother-in-law and she will be very frightening. My friends thought the same and no one tried to deny it as it is a universal truth.
I was very unmannered and moody in the start (maybe my husband still thinks that I am the same but I have improved a lot till now). Whenever she said something I always said “No”. I had already thought that she can’t be sincere to me. I denied her to every possible try and if I did not deny then I used to do what my will was. She used to bear everything with patience but I was very doubtful of this patience too. Once my mother-n-law said something to her sister then she said that if your daughter-in-law denies you in the answer of a question then will you not get annoy? Then my mother-in-law answered with innocence that she ways denies me but I do not get annoy.
This type of mother-in-law can’t be found even if you roam around with light in your hands. I was the fifth daughter of my mother but my mother-in-law has no daughter. She has only two sons. That’s why my mother-in-law used to say me my only daughter with love. In the starting of my marriage she used to come and sit with me when she took tea or do something else. Suddenly when I looked at her she watched me with love and said in Punjabi that
“O Allah! You are very great. Many thank to you.”
Once I was talking to my cousin on a very important family matter on phone. When I hung up the phone she said
“Daughter, you do very good talk, I can’t talk like this as I am illiterate, and Allah has blessed you with such intelligence”
Then she hugged me and gave me love and gave prayers. I laughed very much and said that
“Mother, everyone says that I anger everyone by saying the truth through phone and other talk and you are the one who thinks that my wrong actions are also right”
Cooperation of my mother in law:
Mostly, the wishes of mother-in-law vanish after one or two years of marriage. But my mother-n-law still finds a way to make me happy. When I go to her city she cooks food of my choice. She arranges other stuff for my children and separate stuff for me. When I wear any new clothes she gives prayers like it is my fourth day of marriage. A few days ago we went somewhere, when we came back she said that I saw there that my daughter was looking the most beautiful among all of them and was doing good talk too and she also told about this to my mother and praised me.
I, my father in law, my mother in law, and my husband went on Hajj together. During that time because of my illness I was taking such medicines, I used to come in anger and became low tempered due to the affects of the medicine .My mother in law acted with patience during all the travel and after coming back if she told anyone something always told well. May Allah bless her with good.
After my marriage I didn’t know how to cook and do other work. Actually I had elder sisters who used to take care of the house. After their marriage it had been very late when my mother tried on me. I refused to learn anything like a old parrot. Whatever I used to do was always by force. My mother also told my mother in law that she doesn’t know how to manage a house. She said that no problem, we will appoint made. I am taking her with me as a daughter and in fact she always full filed what she said and is fulfilling till now.
How my mother in law encouraged me:
After marriage when I used to ask my sisters and mothers and follow books to cook she used to become happy and if something went wrong she always encouraged me.
“Don’t lose courage, it is very good”
I have many examples that if daughter in law gave any gift to mother in law she never liked it and if even she keeps it, she tells everyone that my son gave me this gift. My mother-in-law acts totally opposite. When I give her clothes or anything else she always becomes happy and I feel satisfied. Then she tells everyone in the family that my daughter in law gave me this gift. Then when she wears it she tell tells me that today I wore that suit you gave me and everyone liked it, my daughters choice is very nice I gave many prayers to you.
When we use to come back to our city from her city, then she gives me pure ghee, pure ginger, one or two dishes and many types of desserts so that my daughter will get tired after travelling and not be able to do work. Even there is very less distance between our cities and there are servants too in my house, she does this because of her love and sincerity.
My mother in law belongs to a land owner family; she didn’t offer prayer and fast. When she saw that I am not fasting then she asked me to calculate the “fidya” and then she gave it.
And also calculate about prayer. She also gives “fidya”(amount paid,when someone is not able to pray) when she doesn’t pray.
All of you are requested to pray for my mother in law that may her shelter be always on us with health and belief. May Allah make us able to obey her and also that if Allah gave me life then also bless me as a good mother in law for my daughter in laws (Ameen).
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