Worries & Insecurities Of A Mother

Worries & Insecurities Of A Mother

Worries & Insecurities Of A Mother

Nowadays mothers are worried about the marriage of their daughters before son even though the sisters are younger. This story tells about the worries & insecurities of a mother

“Mom, get me married.”
Mother got a jerk while drinking water.
“Get me married, uhhh,” she imitates him.
“You are asking to get married as if asking for a meal.” she cleaned up her face with a hanky and said sarcastically.
“What is the matter mom whenever I talk to you, you said the same thing”, he said.
“Then what do you want? I take your baraat on just your saying? don’t you see your two younger sisters? Who will ask them for marriage if I get u married first? Who will worry for their dowry? After your marriage you will not even talk to us?” he felt extremely disappointed by her clear words.
“Why do u think like that mom, you are my mother, they are my sisters, she will be my wife, I know how to keep everyone’s importance. I know they both are my responsibility. When did I say not to take care of them? But I have my own feelings too…”
He felt that he had gone too far so he stopped.
“Just stop it, you and your feelings,” mother ignored all the facts.
“Just wait till your wife enters as if I don’t know the boys of these days. Try to put some effort into building two rooms upstairs first. Where will you keep your wife? Here in this henhouse of two rooms which is not even enough for us.” she lets down the idea till the marriages of two younger sisters and a proper space to live in.
Three years back, when Salim Javed had been doing a job at that time he asked to get married and he was twenty-five years old. His sisters were much younger. One was seventeen, the other one was fifteen and ‘nanna’ was only ten years old. In such condition, he wanted to get married and settle down. After getting inner contentment he will focus on his sisters’ matter but mother had her own reservations and she never agreed upon. He had turned twenty-nine in such tug-of-war. Sisters were grown up by then. Mother had summed up a lot for the elder one, just waiting for the right proposal to come which was nowhere around. Next would be the younger sister and after those two girls marriage ceremony, she would think about Salim whereas nanna was too young to even mention. This simple and easy formula of a mother was hard to understand for Salim. He repeatedly asked about his marriage in a month or two.
“What is the matter, mother? I am earning well, I will even earn better if I work in two shifts. I will build a house too and sister’s dowry too. Why in the world don’t you trust me? When I say sisters are my responsibility, Why don’t you understand?”
“Salim you have become shameless. You start after every now and then. I ask you to be shameful a bit. What will your such demands affect your sisters?” she started to disgrace him as usual. But today she did it at her tilt.
“Don’t you feel any shame demanding this again and again? You are going out of your limits so early. What is your age now? Your father married at the age of thirty-four. He arranged marriages for his four sisters and said not even a word. You are so burdened for only two sisters. They are sitting and you are asking for your marriage first. Keep repeating for God know’s how many years?” she scolded in such a harsh way that habitual Salim could not resist. He suddenly got up slammed the door loudly and went off.

Extreme Summer and blow-offs of hot winds with trails of sweat, he wandered around the paths, kicked off the pebbles and enraged with himself. What to do? Where to go? Whom to say? How to tell? This world would not let to live. Illegitimate relationships were the way to hell and nobody agreed upon what was legitimate.
He had thought that he would utter a word about marriage and wise mother would know. He would not be needed to explain more. Afterall, a young son was demanding so there might be a reason behind but that was all his foul thinking.

Father was not with them he would talk to him or perhaps its father’s absence that made her so insecure that she did not agree whatsoever.

At the age of sixteen, when he left his studies and went to seek some job, he did not have a clue that it would be so tough. At that time nanna was only a year old. For two or two and a half years he served as a salesman at different shops. With an average education, he could not think of a good job. Father passed away in the same condition. After two years of hardships and hand to mouth condition, he got a better job at a garment factory.
This job was a bit better, but his youngness, less knowledge and without a guide he did not know then that it would become malignant to him.
Mixed culture, girls who had been reared in a poor and uncultured surrounding, who did not care for the values and religion. They longed only for cheap fashion and pleasure.
Most of them were waiting for a proposal at their parent’s place and passing their time at the factory. He was a young and simple guy.
Earlier he liked all this over his tough life. As time passed by, he realized its odds. He was about to be misguided when he got the correct guidance from the Manager, who was the former friend of his father and due to his reference he got this job and he started to keep an eye on him. He got to know that nobody was there to tell him about the right and wrong. He explained Salim kindly. Salim reluctantly told the Manager about his problem. He suggested Salim talk to his mother about his marriage.
But there is a difference between saying and doing. He understood his household problems. Siblings were studying. It was difficult to cope up with the financial situation. It would look odd if he talked about his marriage then. He focused on his duty. Two shifts, night duty, over time he did everything and within the span of two years, he changed the domestic situation much. Then he thought he was able to get married and talked to mother but it was like a storm struck. She did not want to agree.
Mother thought that the idea of marriage would fade away as it entered his mind. How could he explain his mother about how hard it was for him to keep himself from an illegitimate relationship, what it took to keep his eye shut, how was he managing to protect himself. What he wanted was not important. It had been five years demanding for the same.
Years after years went by and he got more intense for his demand.

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